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Posts tagged humor
Ohai!
Jun 22nd
Hey everyone! Sorry I’ve been away for so long. This past winter my boyfriend and parents gave me the most wonderful Christmas present ever! They sent me out to California to a riding academy in which I learned so much and really had a great time. I spent about 6 months there. I am finally back home now and have a lot of plans for this summer.
I would like this summer, to really work on Confessh.us (considering it’s been about a year since I really worked on the code), as well as work on the design and back-end code of our movie rental application. I’ve already started porting the code into the new design (sucks we don’t really have a templating system). I’m also going to take a look at some of the PHP code to see if I can slim it down or optimize it in any way. The same goes for Confessh.us.
This summer I’ve also got a lot planned with the horses and with horse shows. We’re definitely trying to recognized!
I’m also going to try to whittle away at my video game list. I’ve got so many in there. I picked up Final Fantasy XIII the other day, but I do not see myself playing that game for many months. Heck I still haven’t completed FFX-2 haha. I really love it though. I’ve also got to get crackin’ on some Modern Warfare 2 stuff, if anyone is on LIVE, hit my up, ‘vtequine’ is my gamertag!
Anyways, I hope everyone is well. Keep checkin’ for new stuff!
Happy Birthday to my BFF – Rafael! <3
Nov 20th
A very very happy birthday to my best friend who no longer has time to talk to me anymore! Rafael, I hope you had a very wonderful birthday. Here’s to another year of eliteness and codez hacking skills!

Love Morgan xoxoxo
Porn: Yeah, I Watch It…
Nov 15th
Before you proceed, this post is very very NSFW.
I’m not obsessed. I don’t have hard drives and terabytes of porn laying around, in fact, the only porn I own was sent by a friend. Porn is certainly a taboo subject and this post contains lots of my personal thoughts about it. If you’re uncomfortable with it, simply leave, it’s okay. Porn is not a subject for everyone. I myself actually had to think about this post and wonder if it would even see the light of day, but as you can see it did.
Porn is personal thing, at least for me it is. I don’t tend to go around explaining to people about the last video I watched on YouPorn, or rarely do I ever share images I’ve found or video clips. I tend to keep it all to myself. I don’t watch it very often or collect images and save galleries to my computer. I tend to be very picky with what I watch and where I watch or look for new stuff. There’s really only a couple sites I check out from time to time. Porn is something I feel like everyone has seen at least once if not many times willingly. By normal society standards it’s definitely a private sort of activity. Each person has his or her own favorite type or style. Each person has their own varying degree of how often they view it. But this posting isn’t about everyone else, it’s about me.
Porn for me is simply something that shows me how other every day people do something that’s just a natural part of the human life. It’s really nothing more and nothing less. That said, you can usually find me watching the amateur, home made, camcorder porn. I do not like porn with a story line, I do not like porn with porn stars and muscled built-up men. It’s just not my thing. I prefer watching normal every day people have sex. I don’t care of your hairs all messed up, and your shirt on backwards or if your rooms a mess, it’s much more natural, and it reminds me of my own sex life. I’d rather see some random boyfriend having sex with his girlfriend outside behind a shed, then some setup, fake looking scene with some girl being paid to orgasm. I’d rather see a girl who doesn’t have a perfect body having sex with a guy over some big boobed girl getting fucked by some guy who’s 30 years older then her. Real world sex just turns me on a lot more. I want to watch something I can emulate myself, or have the desire to do on my own.
A Girl Living In a Boys World
Nov 15th
First before I jump into anything, this post is simply meant to be silly. I don’t recommend following any of the advice or taking anything said too seriously.
Being a girl on the Internet has it’s up and downs. Everyone either wants to be your boyfriend or they want nothing to do with you. When people find out I’m a girl, I’ve either just made 50 new friends or 10 new enemies…I guess I should be more specific as to where on the Internet I speak of. I’m talking about the underground, not your MySpace, or your Facebook and Twitter, we’re talking about hidden away IRC channels, secret websites and forums, top sites and private game servers. By normal standards you’d never get into these places unless you’re able to hack the planet in your sleep or be able to provide the community with multiple 100mbit lines for various activities. However, being a girl changes everything…
I stepped into “the scene” around 2004, just when Windows Longhorn was coming around and people were all excited about it. It was also a pretty big time for the P2P scene and new networks and applications were growing exponentially. Broadband was becoming bigger and bigger and communities were really starting to take shape and build foundations to what they are today. I made hundreds of new friends, and of course a few enemies. Some of the guys just didn’t like seeing a girl who knew a few things about computers, for what reason I do not know. As a girl, and even to this day, you definitely have certain privileges that would never ever be given to anyone else.
At its peak, I had access to sites with the latest everything, I knew people in release groups like RAZOR1911, developers of the largest P2P networks, operators of the largest beta software channels and champions of DEFCON tournaments. I even dated a well known Microsoft Windows blogger for awhile. It was basically being like on top of the world. With a simple request you could pretty much get anything you wanted. The boys respected me for whatever computer skills I had and were more then willing to teach me more, and they were there to grant me wishes only one could dream of.
The boys seemed to be one of two types of people. Either you were to become their girlfriend instantly or they wanted nothing to do with you. I would say, 95% of the boys I’ve encountered were like this. However, they were a select few who wanted to be your honest to God friend. These people actually treated me like a someone, respected my thoughts and opinions and really were true friends. They didn’t care if I couldn’t memorize my name in binary or play the latest Half-Life game blindfolded, they just cared that I was interested in technology and shared a similar passion as them. Of course, there’s always creepy people on the Internet. At least on the Internet you’ve got the computer between yourself and them. I’ve certainly had my fair share, and being a girl, I found if you just ignore them, they’ll just come and go. They generally mean no harm, but some of them can be beyond ridiculous. It’s best just to put those ones on block!
Unfortunately over time even the select few boys who seemingly cared moved on. They wanted more out of me then I was able to provide. Something about a geeky girl really gets the guys. Romantically I wasn’t there for them, so they gave up and left. So much for just wanting to be friends…The few connections I had with some really great people were put on the shelf or ended all together. 99.999% of the boys I’ve met online have either lost interest either right away because I will not date them or if we actually manage to become and stay friends, they will tend to fall for me (and yes, I admittedly have fallen for a couple of them) and when I say I’d rather the friendship over the relationship, we stop communicating within a month if not less. As bad as this sounds, it’s something I’ve gotten used too, but whenever it happens, I feel horrible and tend to mope around for months on end. Being a girl on the Internet means you will come across the relationship factor no matter how hard you try to avoid it.
My life in the computer world is slowly coming to an end. I am currently going on my 6th year and it’s certainly showing. Long gone are my days where I can snap my fingers and have the latest DVDRiPs sitting in my inbox or be able to access the fastest servers. I have a feeling half of this is because of the way things have changed. People have grown up, the guys have real jobs and real lives now, and I certainly have my own as well. It’s been years since I’ve talked to some of the boys, we’ve just grown apart and moved on with our lives. This of course doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten anyone and I am certainly able to swing a few deals here and there (ones that still wouldn’t be as easy to close if I wasn’t a girl).
Being a girl on the Internet clearly has it perks whether you wish to recognize them or not. I will admit I have taken advantage of it a few times. It’s honestly hard not too, but you must never willingly do so. The boys will almost literally do anything for you, and you must respect them if they’re respectful of you. They’re no different then non-geeky people, they have normal feelings and needs/wants just like everyone else. I have always tried to be as respectful as possible and have always been thankful to the people who have taught me things or provided me with the tools and knowledge to learn more. If there’s one thing to understand if you’re a female in the boys territory, it’s to appreciate what lengths they will go to for you. I will never forget the people, the boys who have touched my life in one way or another. I will never forget late nights of gaming with the gang, or solving random code issues, or reading cyberpunk novels with friends, or trying out the latest beta software, or even just chatting about random technology tidbits on Skype for hours on end. Being a girl on the Internet is awesome…but the most important thing is just be who you are and appreciate the people who will do anything for you.
Rammstein – Liebe ist für alle da
Oct 16th
One of my favorite all time bands just released their latest album. After not hearing from them for about 4 years they pumped out what I think is a great album! Since I cannot review music/bands/albums for the life of me, I’ll just go with snag their new album and give it a go. You’ll enjoy it! Here’s the lyrics to one of their new songs which makes me smile and possibly laugh a little :)
Pussy
Too big, too small,
Size does matter after all.
Too big, too small,
He might be a little bigger.
Mercedes-Benz on the highway
Travel alone to foreign countries,
Travel, travel, driving
I just want fun, not fall in love
Just a little bit…
Just a little bitch!
You’ve got a pussy,
I have a dick,
So what’s the problem?
Let’s do it quick.
So take me now before it’s too late
Life’s too short, so I can’t wait.
Take me now, oh don’t you see,
I can’t get laid in Germany.
Too short, too tall,
Doesn’t matter, one size fits all.
Too big, too small,
The barrier should be on top
Beautiful girl, hungry for more?
Blitzkrieg with the meat gun!
Brandy in your head, you lovely bride,
plug into your bratwurst sauerkraut!
Just a little bit…
Be my little bitch!
You’ve got a pussy,
I have a dick,
So what’s the problem?
Let’s do it quick!
So take me now before it’s too late
Life’s too short, so I can’t wait.
Take me now, oh don’t you see,
I can’t get laid in Germany.
Germany!
Germany!
You’ve got a pussy,
I have a dick,
So what’s the problem?
Let’s do it quick!
You’ve got a pussy,
I have a dick,
So what’s the problem?
Let’s do it quick!
You’ve got a pussy,
I have a dick,
So what’s the problem?
Let’s do it quick!
So take me now before it’s too late
Life’s too short, so I can’t wait.
Take me now, ooh don’t you see,
I can’t get laid in Germany
A Horse On A Bus!
Oct 8th
That was no ordinary commuter waiting patiently Tuesday at a Metro stop in northwest Houston. And with those four legs of hers, finding a seat on a bus probably would have been a challenge.
Miss B, as she’s known in the neighborhood, had been missing since early Thursday when a crash of thunder sent the skittish horse bolting from her shed at the home where Denice Timmons lives.
“We had neighbors and everybody looking for that horse,” a relieved Timmons said.
Best Buy – Remove *ware For a Fee?!
Sep 12th
This is just a mini rant. The other day I was in Best Buy (trust me I try not to shop there often) but I needed some dual-layer DVDs and that was the fastest way to obtain them. I really hate having to go into the computer section and having list to the poor saps ask about Windows this and Windows that and virus this and malware that…there’s been a couple times where I’ve actually interrupted the sales people to remind them of their Apple section…as small as it is…but this isn’t about that.
This story is about how Best Buy charges people to removed pre-installed, YES, PRE-INSTALLED malware on their systems. I almost shit my pants when I heard this….How does one sell a computer with malware ALREADY installed on it?! This put me into shock. I mean…it’s bad enough Windows already gets infected the second you put it on the Internet, but hell, now you don’t even have to do that! You can purchase a BRAND NEW computer and it already comes with it! I guess that’s a new feature or something…
Please someone enlighten me if I heard wrong though!
World of Warcraft: P1mp My Mount!
Apr 1st
This has to be one of the coolest I’ve seen today!
Tired of your mount looking like every other raptor, wolf, horse, kodo, or nightsaber out there? Want to spice it up with some armor plating, a few spikes or chains, or maybe even some flaming decals? Then Z to the A to the zzber (whew, that’s a mouthful!) will be glad to welcome you to his shop where you can epic-ize your mount with some phat total pimpage!
Coming in a future content patch, we plan to bring you a new feature that will allow you to alter the color, the armor, or add decorations to your in-game mounts. Simply drop in to Zazzber’s Local Fix-’Er-Up, pay a small fee, and leave your mount there overnight. The next morning, you’ll pick up a mount that is uniquely yours!

Maybe coming back from the dead changed me; I’ll never know for sure. But all I know is that I’ve always loved my kitty-cat. Sure, the other death knights thought it was a little silly but now I fire up my cat’s phat nitro-boosters and blast those death knights on dead horses out of this life!







